finding a balance
Ben is swamped at work. He is putting in early-morning, late-night, twelve- hour days and says it is awful.
The protective wife in me wants to urge him to step back and take it easy on himself, but instead I listen to his complaints and try to not grumble (too much) about him being away from us.
Gracie has been working hard on a project for school. She spent hours researching and making her project to give her presentation. It has been strange to get used to the amount of homework in fifth grade, and I hear that it is just going to increase next year. I said something to her this morning about enjoying the sunshine at recess today and she responded by telling me she hasn't been going out to recess lately because she needs the extra time to work on things at school.
The protective mama in me wants to call her teacher to complain about a ten year old missing recess, but instead I asked Gracie to look into what we could do at home this weekend to catch her up so that she would feel back on track and could enjoy recess once again. I know Gracie and I know that it is the perfectionist in her that sometimes makes things take much longer than they should. She will have to learn how to manage her time and that is not something I can do for her while she is at school.
Luke is learning lessons on the basketball court. Third grade basketball is much different than younger-age basketball. Certain players get more playing time than others. Certain players start the game each week. Luke is learning that he is not one of the best players on the team.
The protective mama in me wants to grumble about Luke getting ten minutes of playing time in an hour long game, but instead I realize that this is a life lesson for Luke. The kids who play better practice. Some are even on two teams. Luke does not like to practice. We tell him to go down in the basement to practice dribbling or head out to the driveway to his hoop, but he grumbles and resists. School comes easily for Luke, so it might be a good thing for him to realize that not everything in life is going to come easily for him.
Gracie and Luke are waaay into horrible Disney tween shows right now. You might think I am overreacting for effect, but they really are awful. I cringe when the characters talk in snarky, self-centered, rude ways- all to a laugh track cheering it on! Lying and trying to deceive your idiotic parents seems to be a common theme in the shows.
The protective mama in me wants to ban these shows altogether, but that is not realistic. I know I can't shelter them from everything and I don't want them to grow up in a bubble. Their friends watch and talk about these shows. I grew up watching crap on Nickelodeon and I turned out okay. Lately I find myself nearby as they watch them so that we can discuss some of the choice words and actions the characters do. We talk- a lot- about the things we see in the shows that are not acceptable in our family.
I feel like I am constantly working on finding a balance. One side of me fears being overprotective and not letting the kids make (and learn from) hard lessons and potential mistakes. The other side of me struggles to stand behind my beliefs about what is best for my kids and to be firm and deliberate in my mothering choices.
The protective wife in me wants to urge him to step back and take it easy on himself, but instead I listen to his complaints and try to not grumble (too much) about him being away from us.
Gracie has been working hard on a project for school. She spent hours researching and making her project to give her presentation. It has been strange to get used to the amount of homework in fifth grade, and I hear that it is just going to increase next year. I said something to her this morning about enjoying the sunshine at recess today and she responded by telling me she hasn't been going out to recess lately because she needs the extra time to work on things at school.
The protective mama in me wants to call her teacher to complain about a ten year old missing recess, but instead I asked Gracie to look into what we could do at home this weekend to catch her up so that she would feel back on track and could enjoy recess once again. I know Gracie and I know that it is the perfectionist in her that sometimes makes things take much longer than they should. She will have to learn how to manage her time and that is not something I can do for her while she is at school.
Luke is learning lessons on the basketball court. Third grade basketball is much different than younger-age basketball. Certain players get more playing time than others. Certain players start the game each week. Luke is learning that he is not one of the best players on the team.
The protective mama in me wants to grumble about Luke getting ten minutes of playing time in an hour long game, but instead I realize that this is a life lesson for Luke. The kids who play better practice. Some are even on two teams. Luke does not like to practice. We tell him to go down in the basement to practice dribbling or head out to the driveway to his hoop, but he grumbles and resists. School comes easily for Luke, so it might be a good thing for him to realize that not everything in life is going to come easily for him.
Gracie and Luke are waaay into horrible Disney tween shows right now. You might think I am overreacting for effect, but they really are awful. I cringe when the characters talk in snarky, self-centered, rude ways- all to a laugh track cheering it on! Lying and trying to deceive your idiotic parents seems to be a common theme in the shows.
The protective mama in me wants to ban these shows altogether, but that is not realistic. I know I can't shelter them from everything and I don't want them to grow up in a bubble. Their friends watch and talk about these shows. I grew up watching crap on Nickelodeon and I turned out okay. Lately I find myself nearby as they watch them so that we can discuss some of the choice words and actions the characters do. We talk- a lot- about the things we see in the shows that are not acceptable in our family.
I feel like I am constantly working on finding a balance. One side of me fears being overprotective and not letting the kids make (and learn from) hard lessons and potential mistakes. The other side of me struggles to stand behind my beliefs about what is best for my kids and to be firm and deliberate in my mothering choices.
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