{stupid, stupid kangaroo shirt}
My child takes "stubborn" to a whole new level.
I remember before having Drew coming across a book titled "How to Parent the Strong-Willed Child" and I thought, "That's silly....aren't all children strong-willed?"
Now I know differently.
The drama in our house this morning revolves around a light blue soccer shirt. When Drew began soccer last week, he was given a light blue tee shirt with a kangaroo on the front. We weren't given the instructions that we had to wear the shirt to class or anything, it was just given to us. Over half the boys in the class did not wear their shirt from the week prior (we started in week two).
This morning Drew was excited for soccer. He told us first thing this morning that he was going to remember to take a water bottle this week and couldn't wait to go. He wanted to get dressed for soccer at 6:30 for his 10:15 class. We found his soccer shorts and looked in his closet for his kangaroo shirt. It wasn't there, so we checked his clean laundry basket. It wasn't there, so I told him after we took Gracie and Luke to school we could start some laundry and that I was sure his shirt was in a hamper somewhere.
Now, three hours and three loads of laundry later, this stupid shirt still has not been found. He flat out refuses to go to soccer if he doesn't have on the right shirt, no matter how many times I tell him it isn't a requirement. I have turned this house upside down looking for it and can't imagine where it could have disappeared to.
I tried all of my best and most patient parenting tricks to come up with a solution, but darn this kid is stubborn! When patience, kindness, reasoning, and empathy did not work, I got stern and told him that yes, he was going to soccer. We signed up for it and his teacher is expecting him. And then the tears started. He kept crying, "I can't go without my special kangaroo shirt!" and, like a broken record, I kept saying, "You are going to go to soccer."
The crying escalated into a full-fledged tantrum and the cries of "I don't want to go without my shh-ir-ir-ir-ir-ir-rrrt!!" and "I'm NOT going to soccer today!" went on for twenty minutes straight, no joke. Drew was crying, Katie was crying, and I wanted to cry.
Finally, I said, "Drew, if you can't calm down and get some control of yourself, you are just going to have to take a rest for a while."
He stopped crying and matter-of-factly (with a splotchy red face and with that gulpy- breathing thing kids do after a long cry) said, "OK, I will rest instead of going to soccer since I don't have the right shirt."
And the little stinker has been resting on my bed ever since.
Part of me feels like I lost a battle this morning. I am aware my parenting skills leave something to be desired; I said he was going to go to class, but didn't follow through and he got his way.
The other part of me is kind of wondering if, in the grand scheme of things, this is such a big deal. Clearly he was tired and needed some more sleep. Forcing him to go would have resulted in more stress for both of us, as I have no doubt he would have cried the whole way to soccer and probably refused to participate in class because he is just that strong willed.
So instead of a Monday morning at soccer class, we are going to have a sleepy Monday morning at home- two kids sleeping in their beds and one mama in need of a second cup of coffee and a reset button to my week.
I remember before having Drew coming across a book titled "How to Parent the Strong-Willed Child" and I thought, "That's silly....aren't all children strong-willed?"
Now I know differently.
The drama in our house this morning revolves around a light blue soccer shirt. When Drew began soccer last week, he was given a light blue tee shirt with a kangaroo on the front. We weren't given the instructions that we had to wear the shirt to class or anything, it was just given to us. Over half the boys in the class did not wear their shirt from the week prior (we started in week two).
This morning Drew was excited for soccer. He told us first thing this morning that he was going to remember to take a water bottle this week and couldn't wait to go. He wanted to get dressed for soccer at 6:30 for his 10:15 class. We found his soccer shorts and looked in his closet for his kangaroo shirt. It wasn't there, so we checked his clean laundry basket. It wasn't there, so I told him after we took Gracie and Luke to school we could start some laundry and that I was sure his shirt was in a hamper somewhere.
Now, three hours and three loads of laundry later, this stupid shirt still has not been found. He flat out refuses to go to soccer if he doesn't have on the right shirt, no matter how many times I tell him it isn't a requirement. I have turned this house upside down looking for it and can't imagine where it could have disappeared to.
I tried all of my best and most patient parenting tricks to come up with a solution, but darn this kid is stubborn! When patience, kindness, reasoning, and empathy did not work, I got stern and told him that yes, he was going to soccer. We signed up for it and his teacher is expecting him. And then the tears started. He kept crying, "I can't go without my special kangaroo shirt!" and, like a broken record, I kept saying, "You are going to go to soccer."
The crying escalated into a full-fledged tantrum and the cries of "I don't want to go without my shh-ir-ir-ir-ir-ir-rrrt!!" and "I'm NOT going to soccer today!" went on for twenty minutes straight, no joke. Drew was crying, Katie was crying, and I wanted to cry.
Finally, I said, "Drew, if you can't calm down and get some control of yourself, you are just going to have to take a rest for a while."
He stopped crying and matter-of-factly (with a splotchy red face and with that gulpy- breathing thing kids do after a long cry) said, "OK, I will rest instead of going to soccer since I don't have the right shirt."
And the little stinker has been resting on my bed ever since.
Part of me feels like I lost a battle this morning. I am aware my parenting skills leave something to be desired; I said he was going to go to class, but didn't follow through and he got his way.
The other part of me is kind of wondering if, in the grand scheme of things, this is such a big deal. Clearly he was tired and needed some more sleep. Forcing him to go would have resulted in more stress for both of us, as I have no doubt he would have cried the whole way to soccer and probably refused to participate in class because he is just that strong willed.
So instead of a Monday morning at soccer class, we are going to have a sleepy Monday morning at home- two kids sleeping in their beds and one mama in need of a second cup of coffee and a reset button to my week.
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