uuuggghh.
Kate is not having the best of school years.
There's just too much to go into really. It feels too private to record here. The very shortened version is what I have shared before- her class has some really badly-behaved kids in it. There's a lot of talking back, arguing, tattling, defiance, and meanness. Two of the nicer girls in the class were pulled out of the class by their parents, if this tells you the extent of the mess. The teacher may or may not be doing her best with a tough situation. Her heart seems to be in the right place, but I think she is overwhelmed.
At this time, in January, I have hit the point where I am just waiting out the school year in the hopes that next year will be better. I can't stand the thought of Kate having another school year like this one.
The thing is, every time that I kind of convince myself that maybe, just maybe, things are finally starting to go a little bit better..... suddenly they aren't.
At the beginning of December, I hoped that things had improved. But then Kate was upset because some kids teased her about her American Girl doll that she brought in for Show and Tell.
A bit later, she seemed excited about "Yes Day"- a reward day the class earned with positive behavior. But then she got in my car after school and all of the excitement had faded and she just looked sad. Her words were "Yes Day wasn't fun like I thought it would be. ..... everyone just fought about everything."
Then we had Christmas break and she got to take a nice break from it all. She returned and things were smooth for a bit. But then she wasn't invited to the birthday party of one of the girls in the class and I got worried about things again. (Not because I particularly like this little girl but because Kate seemed purposefully excluded by someone she claims is her friend.)
And then last week things seemed okay. Kate went to Girl Scouts and had a good time. She went to the birthday party of a friend from kindergarten and had fun. She started ballet class and was all smiles. My Friday morning volunteer time in her class was smoother than usual. She was invited to play at the house of a friend from kindergarten and had a great time. I let myself relax and stop worrying about my sweet girl.
Because of this, it was really hard to have the afternoon we had today. I pulled into the lot after school to pick up Kate and Drew and I knew, from the first half-second that I saw Kate walk towards the car, that she was pretty upset. She got into the car and climbed into the driver's seat, positioning herself on my lap between me and the steering wheel. She buried her face against me and just starting sobbing. I kept asking, "Kate, what's wrong? Are you hurt? Are you sick?" but she just cried and hugged me. Finally after a couple of minutes, she finally said, "I just missed you today and I had a bad day and I wanted you."
uugggh. So hard.
For the rest of the afternoon, she would volunteer no additional information. She wouldn't tell me why it was a bad day. I sent a quick email to her teacher to see if she was aware of anything, but she couldn't offer anything. She did say that Kate seemed fine for most of the day, but started crying about five minutes before the end of the day.
We spent a lot of time together this evening. I feel so tender towards her dealing with this stress right now. She is a sensitive kid for sure, but bursting into tears at the end of the school day is not typical behavior at all. It makes it kind of hard to want to send her back there tomorrow.
There's just too much to go into really. It feels too private to record here. The very shortened version is what I have shared before- her class has some really badly-behaved kids in it. There's a lot of talking back, arguing, tattling, defiance, and meanness. Two of the nicer girls in the class were pulled out of the class by their parents, if this tells you the extent of the mess. The teacher may or may not be doing her best with a tough situation. Her heart seems to be in the right place, but I think she is overwhelmed.
At this time, in January, I have hit the point where I am just waiting out the school year in the hopes that next year will be better. I can't stand the thought of Kate having another school year like this one.
The thing is, every time that I kind of convince myself that maybe, just maybe, things are finally starting to go a little bit better..... suddenly they aren't.
At the beginning of December, I hoped that things had improved. But then Kate was upset because some kids teased her about her American Girl doll that she brought in for Show and Tell.
A bit later, she seemed excited about "Yes Day"- a reward day the class earned with positive behavior. But then she got in my car after school and all of the excitement had faded and she just looked sad. Her words were "Yes Day wasn't fun like I thought it would be. ..... everyone just fought about everything."
Then we had Christmas break and she got to take a nice break from it all. She returned and things were smooth for a bit. But then she wasn't invited to the birthday party of one of the girls in the class and I got worried about things again. (Not because I particularly like this little girl but because Kate seemed purposefully excluded by someone she claims is her friend.)
And then last week things seemed okay. Kate went to Girl Scouts and had a good time. She went to the birthday party of a friend from kindergarten and had fun. She started ballet class and was all smiles. My Friday morning volunteer time in her class was smoother than usual. She was invited to play at the house of a friend from kindergarten and had a great time. I let myself relax and stop worrying about my sweet girl.
Because of this, it was really hard to have the afternoon we had today. I pulled into the lot after school to pick up Kate and Drew and I knew, from the first half-second that I saw Kate walk towards the car, that she was pretty upset. She got into the car and climbed into the driver's seat, positioning herself on my lap between me and the steering wheel. She buried her face against me and just starting sobbing. I kept asking, "Kate, what's wrong? Are you hurt? Are you sick?" but she just cried and hugged me. Finally after a couple of minutes, she finally said, "I just missed you today and I had a bad day and I wanted you."
uugggh. So hard.
For the rest of the afternoon, she would volunteer no additional information. She wouldn't tell me why it was a bad day. I sent a quick email to her teacher to see if she was aware of anything, but she couldn't offer anything. She did say that Kate seemed fine for most of the day, but started crying about five minutes before the end of the day.
We spent a lot of time together this evening. I feel so tender towards her dealing with this stress right now. She is a sensitive kid for sure, but bursting into tears at the end of the school day is not typical behavior at all. It makes it kind of hard to want to send her back there tomorrow.
Comments